Stay On Target....!

Today's beta was 112, which is more than double Wednesday's 52. We're right on the curve of average. :) This is a nice feeling. According to one beta tracker it doubled in 43.63 hours; according to the other, it's a rise of 115%, 15% more than expected. That one even gave me a chart!

I probably won't have much to add between now and next Friday, which is First Ultrasound day. According to my calculations that will be about three days too early to hear a heartbeat, which should be visible by a week from Monday.

I would have liked the beta to have risen more, but average is fine. Average is just fine!

Day 2.

The
feeling
of building
a house of cards

is disconcerting. Right now, I am happy. Happier than I've ever been, really -- all signs point to a good pregnancy so far, but my brain keeps telling me one beta is little to go on. It's the looming spectre of tomorrow's beta which is making me shiver in fear. Will it be at least 116? Is it doubling? Are those cramps? Do I still "feel" pregnant? Is there blood? Is that a pink tinge?

Yes, I am fully capable of driving myself insane in a period of less than 24 hours and I have another potential eight months to get through!

WAHOO!!

Beta of a nice, normal 52! We have lift off!!

IT'S OFFICIAL!

...and the nurse even sounded happy this time.

13 DPO.

I feel safe enough in saying this today. It won't go out to our friends and family as an announcement just yet, but then again, only one of them can see this blog! :)

You know...

...if this is not The One I'm going to be severely pissed off. It's 6 pm and already today I've experienced:

-two different brands of HPT telling me the same thing, even though it's meaningless.
-Boobhurt. My nipples are huge and my breasts feel like they're on fire, and not in a cute, "IT Crowd" kind of way. Showering hurt.
-Nausea.
-Shakiness.
-Having to pee every hour, on the hour.

If this is just residual trigger there is going to be hell to pay. Merry hell. Seriously merry hell.

12 DPO.

Dear line,

You're still here. You didn't hang around quite as long last time, though those Wal Mart tests can be a bit sketchy, I know. You're still here in a "have to squint to see it" kind of way but not a "Well, if you disassemble the test and hold it up to the strongest light in the house" kind of way. You look like nearly other 12 DPO test on Fertility Friend. You're punctual, too, you show up within 10 minutes like you're supposed to, and for all of those things I think you're the best.

So please, please stay. Hang around. Get darker. You'll find we're not bad people to know once you are here for a bit. Sure, he snores and sure, I spend too much time on the computer, but I think you'll find those things to be lovable quirks in a few months.

Please be real.

10 DPO.

The insanity is optional.

I cleaned out the local Dollar Tree and have been testing daily. So far, I've gotten some pretty pronounced positives -- ones where I don't have to take the test apart and hold it up to the strongest light in the house, at any rate.

Unfortunately, I'm just 6 days past the last hCG booster, so of course the tests are going to be positive. I'm just waiting for that little pink line to fade and AF to show. I know I'm over-analyzing things -- trying to remember "Were they this positive this time last month?" and all of that.

I'm 10 freaking DPO -- and yes, the rational part of me is screaming that even if these were real, it would be DAMNED early to get a pronounced result like this. I'm still in implantation territory, for God's sake!

Wouldn't it be a laugh, though -- to get my BFP on the cycle where I had a Jell-o shot during the 2ww, remembered to take my Metformin and didn't stop riding three days a week because it might jiggle the baby loose?

A girl can dream. :) Especially one that has lost six whole pound on Weight Watchers in three weeks.